Showing posts with label Ding Dongs. Show all posts
Showing posts with label Ding Dongs. Show all posts

2013-07-20

The Challenge

I grew up in a fairly traditional home where dad went to work, and mom stayed home and did stuff. My mom wasn't terribly interested in the domestic part of "stuff" but managed to keep the family running. She would have preferred a career to staying home and raising us, but was quick to say that she was really thankful  we had all come along when we did. I was usually cleaning her kitchen when she made statements like that, so perhaps that was the impetus for her flashes of insight.

Anyway, one of her weekly tasks was to do the grocery shopping. She never made a list and the results were random buys and several trips to the store in addition to the big weekly trips. It was a common occurrence for one of us kids to be sent to the store around the corner to get whatever she had forgotten. If we wanted dinner, we happily did it, because the meal was usually on hold until we came back with the missing ingredient. 

It was always an interesting process to unload the groceries from the Rambler, carry them into the kitchen and begin to unpack the bags to put things away. Somehow, my older brother, Ming, managed to be on the kitchen side of the table and was responsible for the "putting things away" part. It always amazed me how much came out of the bags and how little actually made it to the cabinets when he put himself in that position. He liked to eat, and was smart enough to put himself front and center with easy access to the good stuff. 

We didn't really care about sugar in food then; or preservatives, or artificial sweeteners. Quite honestly, our favorite foods were packed full of those things. Mom kept bottles of Diet Rite cola in the refrigerator and I remember it leaving a funny aftertaste, but we drank it anyway. She was good at making an effort to keep some kind of treats in the kitchen. There was always something for dessert as long as Ming didn't get to it first.

His penchant for devouring whatever passed by him pushed mom into taking some drastic measures when it came to food. She knew that if she was ever going to get any of the good stuff, she was going to have to resort to hiding it. 

Her favorite food was Hostess Ding Dongs, and we never saw them actually come into the house, but she managed to come up with one at night for dessert. She hid them all over the house. I remember finding them quite by accident in the liquor cabinet. I never drank, because that stuff was nasty, but I thought the bottles were pretty cool looking so every once in awhile, I'd open the buffet in the dining room just to look at them. Some of the bottles had clear glass caps that also held liquid, so that if you turned the bottle over, it would fill the cap. And when you turned it back the right way, bubbles would go up into the cap as the liquid drained back into the bottle. I was so easy to amuse.

My friend, Mona, introduced me to Ding Dongs. I remember her mom gave me one after lunch one day, and I loved it so much, she actually pulled out another one and handed it to me. I loved her, and I think I was a continual source of amusement to her. Things that her own daughter would take for granted would send me into fits of enjoyment and gratitude. Like I said, I was easy to amuse.

When I opened the liquor cabinet, and saw the box of Ding Dongs, I counted myself truly blessed and grabbed a couple to devour immediately. I wasn't about to tell the brothers where I found them either. But I think mom kept a count because the next time I got in there to snag one (or three) they were no longer there. 

It became a challenge for us kids to find what she'd hidden. And it became a continual frustration to her when we found her stash and promptly ate it. Ming and Bunns went ahead and consumed the treasure when fate led them to it, but I was always careful to leave one in the box because I figured if I did that, she wouldn't notice that I had gotten in there. Not only was I easy to amuse, but evidently, I wasn't very smart either. 



Keep deception and lies far from me,
Give me neither poverty  nor riches;
Feed me with the food that is my portion,
That I not be full and deny You and say, 
"Who is the Lord?"
Or that I not be in want and steal,
And profane the name of my God.
Prov. 30:8-9






2013-05-04

Real Food

"Pie, Pie, Me oh my, 
Nothing tastes sweet, wet, salty and dry
All at once so well as pie
Apple! Pumpkin! Minced and wet bottom.
I'll come to your place everyday if you've got em'
Pie. Me oh my, I love pie!"

Did you know these are the lyrics from an actual song? Disturbing. Why would anyone write a song about pie? I actually did an Internet search and found several listings for songs about chocolate cake. Now THAT makes sense!! Cake, cookies...... those are worthwhile, Real Food. But pie? No. not so much. 

We used to belong to a church that often chose pie as the main dish for any social get together. So the first time we went to one, I expected to see lots of different desserts, so I put together one of my favorites and brought it. It went completely untouched. NO ONE had any. Which was OK, because it was one of my favorites and I didn't mind taking it home.

But when they said "Pie Social", these people meant business!! The tables were covered with all kinds of pie with my pitiful little NOT pie hanging out in the nether regions of the land of desserts. Honestly, I was tempted to pick up my entire dessert and a fork and sit in the middle of the room to enjoy it. I think my handsome half is very glad that most times I don't do what I'm tempted to do.

You see, I don't like pie. Perhaps it's because I didn't grow up in a traditional holiday celebrating family with turkey and trimmings dinners complete with pie and whipped cream desserts. (I don't like whipped cream either. That one's for free. You're welcome.) We usually had grilled steak, or lasagna for Thanksgiving, and never had pie. I think my dad liked it, but mom didn't and she didn't really love to cook, so on rare occasions we got Mrs. Smith's 'home made' pies, but more often than not, dessert consisted of something else. Like cake, or cookies. Real food. 

I'm pretty sure there won't be any pie in heaven. There are no references to pie in the Bible. 'Cake' is in there a BUNCH of times. The only way 'pie' is in the Bible is as  part of the word 'piece'. And we all know that doesn't count. No wonder cake tastes so heavenly!! Especially chocolate. 

A local deli has a cake that's SEVEN LAYERS of chocolate goodness. Yeah, baby. It's on my bucket list. Pie is anemic  looking and even 'mile high pies' pale in comparison to this chocolate cake sky scraper. Pies have things like fruit and squash in them. But there is not one thing of redeeming value in chocolate cake. It's Real Food. 

I'm a little hungry. And I have a stash of Ding Dong's in the kitchen calling my name. They're little baby chocolate cakes. So, we'll just call them hors d' oeuvres.



When you've stuffed yourself, you refuse dessert; 
when you're starved, you could eat a horse.
Prov. 27:7 (Msg)